Personal Testimony: Deck Fitter Edmund

Born Again: My Journey to Faith

In the Bible, in the third chapter of the Book of John, there is a description of a meeting between Jesus and a man called Nicodemus.

Nicodemus was a leader of the Jews. He was a very clean-living and moral man, and he was very religious. Despite this, Nicodemus was spiritually dead! Nicodemus did not realize he was spiritually dead, but Jesus knew. That is why Jesus said to him, "You must be born again." (John 3:3)

For the first part of my life, I was just like Nicodemus. I too was spiritually dead, and I needed to be born again.

A Broken Beginning

I come from a broken family. When I was just four years old, my father left my mom, my two brothers, and me. I’m not sure why he abandoned us, but perhaps it was because my father and mom were so young when they married—my father was only 19, and my mom was just 15 years old.

Even though I was so young, I can still remember a few occasions when we were all together as a family, having fun in the park. But then, all of a sudden, Dad was gone.

After leaving us, my father didn’t support us in any way whatsoever. My brothers and I were placed in the care of my grandmother in the province while my mom worked hard to provide for us.

Day after day, I used to sit on the stairs of my grandmother’s house, waiting for my mom and dad to come home—but it never happened. It hurt me deeply inside, and much of the time, I cried.

This experience had a big impact on my life. It also affected my ideas about God. I thought God didn’t care about me and that, like my father, He would leave me too when I needed Him most.

A New Father Figure

Some time later, Greg, a widowed man with two children, began courting my mom. Over time, she realized Greg was a good man who loved her, as well as my brothers and me.

Eventually, Mom said to him, "I don’t love you yet, but if you will love my children and send them to school, then I will try to love you." They were eventually married in a civil ceremony when I was six years old.

My brothers and I continued to live with my mom and our stepdad into our teenage years. However, in my late teens, I began to rebel against my parents. I started to smoke, drink, and use drugs.

Often, I heard my mom crying at night because of my disrespect and the troubles I caused her, but I didn’t care about the pain she was going through. I blamed her and my birth father for all our troubles.

One of my habits was smoking marijuana. I used to carry a pocket-sized Bible—not to read, but to hide marijuana sticks. When I was running out of rolling papers, without hesitation, I would tear pages from the Bible to use instead.

As time went by, I became more and more stubborn, ignoring my parents completely. However, one day my stepdad spoke to me again about how much I was hurting my mom. When I looked into his eyes, I truly felt his concern was sincere.

That’s when I started to think seriously about my life. I asked myself, "Where am I heading? Why don’t I have joy and peace in my life instead of so much emotional pain?"

I knew I needed to change, but I didn’t know how. In my desperation, I looked up to heaven and said, "God, if You are real, show me the way because I’m tired of my life."

A Turning Point

Some time later, when I was 23, I went to work in Saudi Arabia. While I was there, I accepted an invitation from one of my co-workers to attend a Bible study in the room next to mine. After a month, I decided to start reading the Bible for myself to see if what they were teaching was true.

As a result of attending the Bible study and reading the Bible, I learned that because of my sin, I was facing God’s judgment and the prospect of spending eternity in hell. However, I also learned that if I repented and received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, God would forgive me and give me His free gift of eternal life.

Seven months after I arrived in Saudi Arabia, with the help of one of the Bible study leaders, I asked God to forgive me, to enable me to repent, and to receive Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.

In the Bible, God says:

“…I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh ... I will put My Spirit within you…” (Ezekiel 36:26)

I know God has done that for me. He has given me a new heart, a new spirit, and a desire to obey His Word. God has forgiven my sins and given me eternal life. Now, by His mercy and grace, I am spiritually alive—I have been born again.

A Life Transformed

After two years in Saudi Arabia, I returned to the Philippines and started training to be a seafarer. I also continued attending Bible studies. At one of these, I met Adora, a high school teacher who was also a mature Christian. We became friends, eventually fell in love, and married in 1996.

Now we have three children—Paul (18) and Kate (14), both professing Christians. We also have a dear little boy named Rob, who is just two years old!

I’ve discovered that the Christian life is not easy and that Christians constantly face temptations and trials.

One of my greatest trials came in 2005. I was onboard a ship when I received the devastating news that my brother had been stabbed to death back home in the Philippines.

I was overwhelmed with emotions, including anger at God for allowing this to happen. My old sinful nature rose up inside me—I wanted revenge on the man who had killed my brother. I wanted him to feel all the pain I was feeling and more.

I struggled a lot during this time and was tempted to start drinking again, but God intervened. He reached out to me through Rob, a port missionary from the Seamen’s Christian Friend Society, who visited my ship at one of our ports.

Even though this was the first time we had met, I invited him to my cabin. With tears in my eyes, I told him what had happened and how I was feeling. He listened carefully, read from the Word of God, and prayed with me.

Over time, God has given me a growing concern for lost souls. He even gave me the grace to pray for the salvation of the man who killed my brother.

Now, onboard each ship I am assigned to, I ask the Lord to enable me to establish and lead a Bible study for my crewmates and to use me for His glory.

God’s Amazing Grace

The Bible says:

"God is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think." (Ephesians 3:20)

It’s true!

Amazingly, my birth father eventually became a Christian, and we now have a good relationship. In addition, my stepdad also became a Christian before he passed away in 2006. My half-brothers and half-sisters have also become Christians.

The port missionary who first visited me in 2005 shortly after my brother’s death has continued to be a dear brother in Christ. He helps me grow spiritually and encourages me to share the Gospel whenever I can.

I am forever grateful to God that the Bible I once mocked is the one I now preach.

All glory to God!